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fiction and musings from a gay black dude with delusions above his station

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the gar spot fiction and musings from a gay black dude with delusions above his station

Tag: coming out

The day Betsy and Sue-Sis got married

Posted on June 29, 2014 by gar

My sister Betsy and her partner Sue got married today. They had been together for 14 years, but the wedding was a spontaneous thing. They were getting ready for work, getting the kids ready for summer day camp, the usual routine. Then they heard that the court struck down the gay marriage ban. Betsy said…

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Jason Collins and the Joy and Importance of Coming Out

Posted on April 30, 2013 by gar

25 years ago, either this week or next, I wrote a letter to my family entitled “What James Baldwin, Bayard Rustin, and Gregory A. Russell Have In Common.” Sadly I don’t think I have a copy of it anymore, though I don’t think the essay itself was as good as the title I gave it….

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Wither the Closet

Posted on July 2, 2012 by gar

Anderson Cooper came out.  Jim Parsons came out.  Ricky Martin came out.  Neil Patrick Harris and George Takei are out all over the place.  Each one of these celebrity outings has weakened the walls of the closet that much more. In his eloquent coming out statement, Mr. Cooper explains that he always wanted to keep…

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And then there were none: A Different Light, A Remembrance

Posted on April 4, 2011 by gar

It sat in a little white building nestled on a small block squeezed by Santa Monica and Sunset. I always had problems finding it exactly, and then there was the parking which was challenging even for a motorcycle.  I didn’t drive cars in those days.  It was small and crammed, the way all independent, hippy-ish…

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Evolution

Posted on November 6, 2010November 6, 2010 by gar

1985. UCLA. Sophomore year. I fell into the swell of anti-apartheid protests that engulfed the campus that year and began to live the life of the “activist student.” My mother made a suggestion.

“You should start writing a journal.”

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SIN AGAINST THE RACE, a novel–Click image for info

Sin Against the Race

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Pride brunch. #pride #pridemonth #pridesunday #pr Pride brunch. 
#pride #pridemonth #pridesunday #prideday #pancakes #brunch
Dug up from the archives. I can’t believe we hav Dug up from the archives. I can’t believe we have to fight for this again. 
#abortionrights #abortionishealthcare #cisgaymanforchoice
Time to write more letters to encourage people to Time to write more letters to encourage people to vote. Tempus fugit.
#abortionrights #abortionishealthcare #roevwade #mymarriageisnext #voteblue #voterepublicansout
Pride flag over the Claremont Hotel. Don’t think Pride flag over the Claremont Hotel. Don’t think I’ve ever seen that before. 
#pride #pridemonth #berkeley
New outdoor dining set. #backporch #alfresco #hom New outdoor dining set. 
#backporch #alfresco #homedecor
Consulted with my editors this morning. I value th Consulted with my editors this morning. I value their feedback. 
#trees #hiking #oakland #writersofinstagram #iputmyfaithintrees
Remembering Roger Ebert on what would have been hi Remembering Roger Ebert on what would have been his 80th birthday. 
#rogerebert #writer #legend #cancersucks
Fly me to the moon (not pictured) Let me play amon Fly me to the moon (not pictured)
Let me play among the stars
Let me see what spring is like
On Jupiter (the brighter one) and Mars
#backyardastronomy #jupiter #mars #predawn #goodmorning
A gorgeous day at the #oaklandgreekfestival #oakla A gorgeous day at the #oaklandgreekfestival #oakland #greekfestival #greek #music #food #ilovemycity
I used to rock the hell out of these. Cards of dis I used to rock the hell out of these. Cards of discovery and endless possibilities. I still miss them. 
#cardcatalog #library #knowledge #og #searchengine
A sunny Saturday in 1990 found my sister Tania (@m A sunny Saturday in 1990 found my sister Tania (@makeuptogoblog) and I outside of the Julia Morgan Center waiting. I had seen the great Maestro Pt. Shivkumar Sharma in LA—he even autographed an album for me. And I was studying tabla with his accompanist Ud. Zakir Hussain at the time. We couldn’t wait. But wait we did, because the maestros weren’t there. As my sister and I stood at the front of the line, they came. Ud. Zakirji was laughing and joking. Pt. Shivji looked as if he floated in as he passed and entered the theater. After we got settled in our seats, it was on. A beautiful concert with the two maestros playing rapturously, holding us spellbound. Pt. Shivji floated in like a deity and played to the heavens, taking us all with him. By far one of my favorite concerts. 

Words cannot describe how devastated I am at the great master’s passing. His gifts to music and the world are incalculable. My condolences to Panditji’s family, to @zakirhq9 , and to all who loved his beautiful music. #ptshivkumarsharma #indianclassicalmusic #santoor #rip
This makes me very happy. #oaklandgreekfestival # This makes me very happy. 
#oaklandgreekfestival #theyreback #yahoo #greek #oakland #ilovemycity
Happy 85th Birthday to legendary Maestro Ron Carte Happy 85th Birthday to legendary Maestro Ron Carter! The most recorded bassist in history, he was a huge inspiration for my late brother Robert. And he continues to inspire bassists and musicians to this day. 
#happybirthday #roncarter #legend #bassist #jazz #music
Dinner on the back porch. #alfresco #dinner #pizza Dinner on the back porch. #alfresco #dinner #pizza #arizmendi #evening
My sacred music day where I pay homage to Duke Ell My sacred music day where I pay homage to Duke Ellington (1899-1974) and Ustad Alla Rakha (1919-2000) on their shared birthday. This year I’m also celebrating the 100th birthday anniversary of harmonica and whistling maestro Toots Thielemans (1922-2016). Enjoy the music of all of these legends! ✌🏾 ❤️ 🎶 
#dukeellington #allarakha #abbaji #tootsthielemans #centenary #happybirthday #music
Happy Birthday Ella Fitzgerald! Born on this day i Happy Birthday Ella Fitzgerald! Born on this day in 1917. 
#ella #ellafitzgerald #firstladyofsong #jazz
It’s the only home we got. Let’s treat it with It’s the only home we got. Let’s treat it with respect and love. 
#earthday #earthday2022 #home #planet #environment
A harrowing day, but it ended safely. I’m home n A harrowing day, but it ended safely. I’m home now with a nice cup of tea. ☕️ 
#berkeley #shelterinplace #allclear #home #tea #murchies
This pale blue beauty is destined to become part o This pale blue beauty is destined to become part of my #sundaybrunch #pancakes. Fresh from my next door neighbor!
Celebrating the centenary of a great musician. Hap Celebrating the centenary of a great musician. Happy 100th Birthday Ustad Ali Akbar Khan Sahib!!! His great legacy lives on. 
#aliakbarkhan #centenary #indianclassicalmusic #sarode
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